So I've finally decided that I'm going to start eating healthier food and working out again. Looking back at my old Instagram photos has made me want to really make a change in my life.
Throwback to fitter times.
Sometimes I wonder how did I let myself get like this? Where was the girl who once had so much determination to get what she wanted? I feel like I've really let myself down because of all the excuses I've been giving myself and trying to convince myself that "it's okay" when it actually wasn't.
I've never been skinny my entire life. Maybe only around the age of seven cause I was hella picky with my food. My entire life has always been me struggling with my body and never being comfortable because I wasn't the "ideal size". In 2012, I actually started pushing myself and a friend to work out and eat clean. And it was working. I was losing weight and I could see my body change. I finally could wear clothes I wanted to wear and feel good.
Me at the age of 7.
But in 2013, I fell down from the monkey/pull up bar at gym and when I hit the ground, my chin split open. Wtf right. I remember trying to get up and feeling like I couldn't even balance myself. I was given sugar because they said it would help and the first thing I remembered asking was, "how many calories are in this?"
I had to get stitches after that and I couldn't work out at all as it wouldn't have helped with the healing process (contact with sweat, water, dirt, etc.) It was pretty miserable not being able to work out for such a long time.
Right after my wound healed, my mom brought my sister and I to korea for the holidays and everything just went downhill from there. When I got home from Korea, I was no longer motivated to work out and eat healthy. I was so afraid to go back to the gym cause I was so embarrassed. In the end, my gym membership expired and I didn't care anymore.
I have gained so much weight compared to before that I think it's finally time I do something about it. Not for other people but for myself. I know the results will not show right away but if I keep persevering, it will eventually. I've finally come to realize that I don't want to be the person I am now. To be honest, I love food and I don't think I can ever give it up. So I'm not gonna starve myself but instead, pick a healthier option when it comes to my food. And to whoever who wants to make a change, it's never too late :) just don't give up.
I made a list of things I'd do to help with the process :
- drink plenty of water
- gym thrice a week
- no soft drinks/sweet drinks/junk food (I've stopped eating fast food for good as well)
- always share desserts so you still enjoy but in a smaller portion
-eat more fruits and vege
That's all I can think of for now. Since I've written it here, there's no turning back now. I'll still post nice yummy looking food pictures tho but I'll still be sticking to my plan. Wish me luck :)
Till next time! x.
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